Reflecting on the 1st Month

Hello everyone! The first month of my fellowship has really flown by. I feel much more settled in now to my living space, community life, and the different roles that I am working in for my time here as a fellow. I’d like to share with you some of the gifts and challenges from this first leg of my journey.

Community life is ever evolving. Jermaine, John, and I have come up with several variations by now of what we hope for our community life to look like. Right now, we have two community dinners each week and our Sunday evenings are dedicated to an alternating spirituality or social night. Each week, one of us gets to facilitate either a community social activity or a reflection and prayer experience. I find doing spirituality nights to be a true gift because each of us prays and worships in different ways. During spirituality nights we not only get to share this with each other but are also able to share a bit of what’s going on in our own spiritual lives and journeys with each other. Each of us are in such different places in our faith live, so we offer different perspectives, carry different “weights”, and need different things. It has been important for me to be mindful that, although community life calls us to live in the spirit of accompaniment, we each need to embrace the truth that we cannot be everything for one another in this year. 

My role as a youth minister at St. Ann’s Parish and as a campus minister for Rider University has proven to be quite difficult, as one would expect during a global pandemic. It is nearly impossible to plan traditional youth ministry experiences with the restrictions in place to ensure everyone’s safety. However, John and I have not stopped trying to come up with safe and innovative ways to meet the youth where they are in this time. What’s been made very clear over the past month is that young people really crave quality human interaction. We’ve been fortunate to have some outdoor programming with St. Ann’s youth this Fall and hope that it will lay the foundation for our virtual programming during the winter months.  When I feel discouraged, it has been important to remind myself that this work takes time, and that these are unprecedented circumstances. Intentionally, we’ve chosen Matthew 18:20 as the mantra for our Youth Ministry programming this year – “Where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am with them” – because at times, it may just only be two or three kids that show up. Regardless of the number, I continue to trust that God is actively working, and to remind myself that God has called me to “feed His sheep”, not count them.

I look forward to seeing what this next month holds in my community life, in the different projects I get to be a part of at CFJ, and in my personal faith journey. 

Be Still

King Solomon wrote, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths”  Proverbs 3:5-6.

Often, a new endeavor or a new path allows us to rely on the previous knowledge we have obtained for our educational, cultural, and economic background. We tend to wrap our head on the things we can view, but the Lord wants us to focus on the unseen things. Can you imagine what would have happened to Abraham if he would have focused on the tangible? God spoke to Abram in Genesis 17, saying, “If you obey me and always do right, I will keep my solemn promise to you and give you more descendants than can be counted. Abram bowed with his face to the ground, and God said, I promise that you will be the father of many nations. That’s why I now change your name from Abram to Abraham” Genesis 17:1-5. 

First, God is asking all his children to be still. We live in a culture in the United States, where individuals highly desire control and instant gratification. We ask for a microwave fix, but the Lord wants his children to spend intimate time with Him during the day. We have got conformable with Sunday Service, Bible Study, Mid-week Prayer Meeting, etc. We are adding band-aid to temporary procedures, where the Lord wanted to perform heart surgeries. For the last couple of weeks, God had allowed me to be still. God has allowed me to visit the Heavenly Doctor for supernatural procedures within my spirit. Jermaine Lee Clark ran toward a direction where my heart and calling was trying to fix into a small box society has formed. I had to be reminded that I couldn’t squeeze into those boxes because I was meant to be outside the box. I never saw the potential God has for my life until I embrace the journey within New Jersey. I experience an Identity crisis, but God changes my name during the process of stillness. Abram had to come to terms with the words that were spoken over his life. Abram didn’t believe God until his ears were in tune within the heaven frequency. Often time, our stillness requires us to listen during the chaos. Even though we are encountering a pandemic, our stillness is critical to unlearn the church’s social teaching so that we can rebuild, restructure. It will renew our inner core values and belief based on the Basic Insturcibe Before Leaving Earth (Bible). 

Second, God is asking his children to get back into the posture of bowing with our face to the ground. We have got accustomed to surface-level relationships with our Heavenly Father. For the last couple of days, I have been questioning God on why I’m not receiving any assignment within the organization. God spoke, saying, you are in a season of birthing, and I need you to revisit everything the African Methodist Episcopal Church has taught you under the leadership of Rev. Ella & Minister James Edwards. Often, we have spiritual amnesia, but God needs us to remember our faith’s foundation. 

  • If you were raised on hymns, go back and listen to those songs.
  •  If you were raised on praying The Holy Rosary, go back and enter your prayer closet. 
  • If you were raised on fellowship or community, find fellowship and community within a virtual environment. 

Even though things have changed, we must remember the original manuscript of our life. Paul taught us in Romans 12:2, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Lastly, accept the new endeavors. It’s has been over a month since I walk into Catholic Charites, Diocese of Trenton. In the first few days, I met the staff and had a virtual conversation with the Executive Director to figuring out how I fit into this big picture of the non-profit organization. The Executive Director was eager to have another fellow for the year. I was anxious to start a project within a confusing system for the organization volunteers. It’s was a great couple of weeks sending email and answering phone calls, but the passion was missing from it all. I hit many roadblocks throughout the weeks and currently experiencing those roadblocks because of the high demand within the organization’s leadership. I am still expiring frustration, but the Lord reminds me to enjoy the little movement and embrace the new endeavors with a different lens. God had me take Abram’s posture because He couldn’t see all God was doing behind the scene. Abram had a lot of questions but listened during the time of quietness. Abram heard the voice of God and entered into a posture of praise and worship. “No longer shall your name be called Abram, but your name shall be Abraham; for I have made you a father of many nations.” When we listen to the voice of God, we will rise with new instruction, vision, dreams, songs, prayer, sermons, business ideas, etc. 

Be Still, and know that I am God!

Psalm 46:10

Spinning

Hey everyone! My name is Linh, I am one of the FaithJustice Fellows this year.  I’ll be sharing snippets of my work, community life, and overall fellowship experience throughout the year on this blog.  Keeping reading to find out how I ended up at CFJ! 

I firmly believe that God uses everything to His advantage, which ultimately is to my benefit. Most times, however, it is much easier for me to believe this in hindsight than during periods of transition, instability, or confusion.

Last year, I was serving as a Jesuit Volunteer at a high school in the Federated States of Micronesia. In March, eight months into my two-year placement, I returned to the United States, like many other international volunteers at the time, due to the Covid-19 pandemic. In the months that followed my departure from Chuuk, I found myself in a liminal and disorienting space – not knowing whether to begin grieving for a journey that had abruptly come to an end or to remain hopeful for an opportunity to return and finish the work that I had been called to do. Genuinely, I was curious to see how God was planning to “spin” this one. 

Spun, He did. On the very day that I received official news that I would not be returning to Chuuk, I also had my interview with Maggie for a FaithJustice Fellowship position. I found CFJ while casually scrolling through the Catholic Volunteer Network in mid-July. At that point, I was feeling pretty desolate. I was struggling to find employment opportunities in general, not to mention work that would nurture the spiritual formation that I craved. Their website looked quite promising but what really had me hoping for an opportunity to work with Center for FaithJustice was my conversation with Maggie. I was drawn to the ethos of this organization which contrasted most of the faith environments I had grown up in. Somehow, in all the “spinning” that God had done, He called me here to accompany young people in their own growth and discernment. Through this, I, too, could continue to discover what it means to be a contemplative in action and to live out the Christian call to service. 

A little bit about myself – I am a second generation Vietnamese American. I am the daughter of two refugee and immigrant parents from Vietnam. I was born and raised mostly in Worcester, MA but I’ve also lived in the Carolinas and in Kansas for a few years. I am a very competitive person, as my community mates have discovered in our recent community night over a “friendly” game of Taboo. One of the things that I miss the most about being a kid is participating in team sports. I miss being an athlete, specifically a volleyball player, and the adrenaline rush that came with the game. A hobby of mine is “dabbling” with instruments and singing. I am a closeted singer – if you asked me to sing for you, I would politely decline. Singing is a very versatile practice. It can be a prayer, a distress cry, a celebration, a way to build community, or simply a way for me to be present in the moment. 

On the note of presence, this is one of the graces I most desire to receive and live out this year. I pray for the ability to be fully immersed in and to savor every part of this work and space. So, whether I am stressing out over a NeXt Level event, navigating community life with John and Jermaine, receiving a much-needed reminder for patience and humility, or simply laughing with the people I encounter on the job, I want to do it all and to do it well. 

Here’s to more spinning. 

Meeting John

Hey everybody! My name is John, and I’m one of the three FaithJustice Fellows for this year. I arrived in Trenton and moved in at St. James mid-July this summer, and since then I have had to hit the ground running! I had a very interesting summer traveling from parish to parish around New Jersey for our “Level Up” programming that is part of CFJ’s NeXt Level project. The norm would have been to gather everyone here in Trenton for a week-long service immersion retreat, but plans change! Instead we did a modified version of the program, going to each participating parish individually for a three-day, socially-distanced, Covid-safe version of Level Up. For me personally, it was an opportunity to explore New Jersey, since I got to visit towns that I had never been to before (I’m a native of Birmingham, Alabama and was living in Essex County, NJ before beginning my fellowship year, but there is so much of the state that I have not yet seen!) The Level Up programs were a success, and it was powerful to have small groups of youth gathering for prayer, formation, and service, in the midst of a global pandemic. It really felt like the Holy Spirit was at work through these small cohorts of youth gathered at their parishes throughout the state (and Brooklyn!). 

Toward the end of the summer, Linh and Jermaine arrived, and our FaithJustice Fellowship community was complete! We had our opening retreat together and decided on the “first-draft ”structure of our shared community life for the year, complete with two community meals per week, social and spirituality nights, and weekly community “business” meetings. We have enjoyed some delicious home-prepared meals and great conversation together already. Linh was in charge of our first spirituality night, where we relaxed and opened ourselves to God, body and soul, through “Holy yoga”. Jermaine kicked off our first social night with a hilarious (and quite competitive) game of Taboo. Quawntashea “Q”, who has been serving as our in-house community engagement facilitator joined us for the fun! I would be remiss to neglect to mention our narrow (but successful!) escape from the Nautilus Submarine-themed “escape room” which we did as a community activity to celebrate Q and Jermaine’s birthdays in September. We even completed our first community service project together, undertaking a major re-organization and de-cluttering of one of the supply rooms in the charter school, “Sprouts”, that is adjacent to our residence at St. James. All in all, community life has been thriving and going well!

Finally, now that the summer Level Up programming has concluded and the school year has begun (even though it is a school year like no other because of the circumstances), the days have been full with the work of building a youth ministry at the Church of St. Ann in Lawrenceville, and continuing to build the campus ministry, in collaboration with the Catholic Campus Ministry student organization at Rider University. Fortunately, these responsibilities are shared between Linh and myself. I have really enjoyed seeing how our gifts compliment one another’s, and how much more we are able to do as a team than either of us would be able to do alone.

Personally, I feel blessed to be a part of the CFJ community and the FaithJustice Fellowship in particular this year. I love the work of ministry, and I am grateful to be able to do it in such a supportive and collaborative environment. Until the next update! 

Your FaithJustice Fellow for this year,

John

I Am – Jermaine Lee Clark

God has a sense of humor. In the Summer of 2019, God allows me to embrace a new summer adventure with the Center for FaithJustice’s (CJF). The summer of 2019 was a learning experience because I didn’t come from a Catholic background. All I knew was the small-town environment of the African-American Methodist Episcopal Church. The A.M.E is a predominantly African-American Methodist denomination. Richard Allen founded the A.M.E Church in Philadelphia in 1787. It’s the oldest denomination in the African-American culture.

You could imagine it was a difficult transition during the Summer of 2019. I felt like I was back at Warner University, during my freshman year of undergrad. It was like preparing for a marathon because I came the second half of the summer while everyone was there for a month.

You could imagine the journey was a rollercoaster ride.

The rollercoaster ride symbolizes all the kicking and screaming that took place. 

The rollercoaster ride symbolizes the new person I meet on the journey. 

The rollercoaster ride symbolizes movement where the ride was calm then it took a sharp turn. 

The rollercoaster ride symbolizes the beautiful scenery along the journey. 

The rollercoaster ride symbolizes that I wasn’t in control, and God was controlling the ride. 

Oftentimes we don’t see all that God is doing, but the Summer of 2019 taught me to embrace the storms with the rain and the winds because it’s going to produce endurance and strength at the end of the day. 

There was a movement where I want to travel back to Florida. 

There was a movement where I questioned God. 

There was a movement where I told the Lord I was not coming back to New Jersey. 

There was a movement where I lost my Identity throughout the process.

Throughout the movement, friendship was forged. 

Throughout the movement, the community was built. 

Throughout the movement, I experience growth in myself and the individuals I was leading. 

Throughout the movement, I experience a close relationship with our Heavenly Father. 

I knew I had to come back to experience the rollercoaster again, but I didn’t know it was going to be this soon. 

The reason why I mention “God has a Sense of Humor” is because I’m back where the journey started in the Summer of 2019. You may be wondering who is the person writing this blog on today. So, let me introduce myself to the Center for FaithJustice- extended family. 

You are looking at a small town individual who God has called to the city. 

You are looking at someone who is from the Sunshine States -Florida.

You are looking at someone whose spiritual foundations were built by his grandparents -Leroy Smith & Glen Rose Smith.

You are looking at young males who loves the Lord with all his heart, mind, and soul. 

 You are looking at someone willing to make faith move when it’s uncomfortable. 

You are looking at someone who loves to travel, but don’t have a vehicle or my license. 

You are looking at someone who has a degree in Bachelor’s Criminal Justice. 

You are looking at someone who is pursuing his Master’s degree in Pastoral Care & Counseling at Southeastern University in Lakeland, Fl. 

You are looking at someone who has a calling to minister to youth and young adults and college-age students. 

You are looking at someone who loves southern cooking, but the New Jersey restaurants would be just fine for now. 

You are looking at someone’s willings to be the hands and feet of Jesus Christ. 

You are looking at someone who lives by Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. 

I am – Jermaine Lee Clark. 

One Final Blog

Well, a lot has happened since I last wrote one of these all the way back in January. I left off saying that my plan for the remainder of the fellowship was to dive into the unknown. Little did I know how much of my fellowship would be the unknown. Back then, Corona Virus was just something we heard going on in China, we still did not know if it would make its way to the US. Of course, we all know that COVID-19 made its way to the US and completely changed everything about our way of life. For me, that meant my students at Rider were sent to their homes to finish the semester and Saint Ann’s limiting the number of people in the physical office. So I went back home to PA and began figuring out how to be a Campus Minister from my home. 

It became completely unknown; I had no idea what my days would look like or what of the events we had planned would be able to continue. I found my students were overwhelmed, much like myself at times. I quickly realized that trying to hold the events we had planned virtually would not be to the benefit of the students, so we switched to focus on doing a simple 15-minute prayer session once a week. These prayer sessions allowed the students to actively bring their faith into the current world without overwhelming any more than they already were. In the end, it was not the ideal situation, but we made it work and the students seemed to really enjoy the programming.

One really sad part of the pandemic was moving home to PA and no longer living with Q and Cat. One of my favorite parts of the fellowship was the community I had with these ladies. I miss seeing them every day, but we came up with a pretty good system. We decided to have dedicated community time each week. We took turns planning the time, one time it was watching a movie, a craft, a conversation about faith, or sharing a meal over FaceTime! It was not the ideal situation either, but I am grateful for it. Leaving this fellowship, we have already had practice in keeping our community going at a distance. I know that when I move up to Boston (don’t worry I’ll tell you about that in a minute) and Cat and Q are in different areas of Jersey that these two ladies and I will be able to keep our community going. 

I also began looking towards next year, both for Rider and myself. With Rider, I was able to help get strong leaders in place for the club. I then worked with the students to create a new constitution for Catholic Campus Ministry. I also got to help the students begin their conversation about plans for next year and then the greater joy sitting back and listening to their ideas and seeing their visions of the club. I am so excited for the future of this organization. I only wish I could spend one more year to see these students blossom, but I also know that God is calling for a new person to help them on their journey. All I can say is that person is beyond blessed.

So where will I be next year?? Any guesses?? Well, I told you up above, I will be moving to Boston so that’s a hint!! Ok, I’ll tell you! I am going to Boston College! I am enrolled in their dual degree program pursuing an MA in Theology and Ministry and an MA in Mental Health Counseling. Going into this year I was pretty sure I wanted to pursue a career in ministry, and this year confirmed that for me. It also told me that my passion for mental health was really a call for a vocation. I am meant to be helping people. Right now I envision my vocation working on a college campus serving both as a campus minister and guiding students in their faith but also in the personal counselor role helping them with mental health because so many college students struggle with this. I currently have only found one person serving in a dual role like this, and guess what, he is at BC, so I will hopefully meet him and get to know what his job is like! I am excited to head up to BC and continue the growth I have had with the fellowship this year.

I am so thankful to have done the FaithJustice Fellowship. This position has pushed and challenged me in the best of ways, but at the same time has brought so many blessings and moments of joy. I want to thank Steph, Mare, and Maggie and the rest of the CFJ community for guiding me through this year. I will not say goodbye because I know I am in the vortex, this is most definitely a see you later. Thank you all for reading and following along this year.

Thank you FJF by Cat

Hey there! Long time no talk! A lot has happened since my last post. Since we last chatted, I applied to and was accepted to Rutgers University School of Social Work and will be working towards attaining my MSW in September. I’ve experienced, and so far survived, my first ever global pandemic. I’ve navigated working from home, and coming to terms with the fact that this is not at all how I expected this fellowship to end. That all being said, sit back and relax as I try and put this whole experience into words. 

Let’s go all the way back to January 2019 when I said yes to the FaithJustice Fellowship. Did I know what I was getting myself into? Not really. Was I scared, nervous, and excited all at the same time? Yes. Did I know how much I would grow from this year? Not even close! Did I know it was the right choice, and that I would be supported in every step I took. Of course! 

Fast forward to August when I moved in and had my first real conversation with Q. We had met before, but had never had a conversation deeper than surface level. A few weeks later Karalyn joined us and we started building our community. Did I know how close we would become and how hard it would be to say goodbye? Not really. Did I know we would all grow and learn from each other? Yes. Did I know our time with Karalyn would be cut short because of COVID-19? Not even close! Did we make the best of the situation? Of course!

Then I started my professional journey working with CFJ, and “NeXt Level Coordinator” became a part of my identity.  Did I know how many professional and personal skills I would gain and strengthen? Not really. Did I know I was going to be challenged? Yes. Did I know much I would be challenged and that looking back on it I appreciate every challenge I faced? Not even close! Did I know I would have the support of the CFJ staff in every challenge I faced? Of course!

As I sit here and try to wrap up this experience, there are two words that keep popping into my head: “thank you.” 

Thank you to the CFJ staff for taking a chance and believing in me enough to offer me the position of NeXt Level Coordinator, and for the countless opportunities this year has provided me. 

Thank you to Maggie for all of your support, guidance, and mentoring. You have challenged me in the best ways and always been there to help me through the rough patches. 

Thank you to Q and Karalyn for being the best community, the hundreds of laughs, the memories I’ll never forget, for reminding me to do my dishes, and being the only people that could’ve helped me survive this year.

Thank you God for putting all these incredible people in my life, and thank you for giving me the strength I need to go out and change the world!  

While I’m still not sure exactly what my future holds, I do know that whatever I end up doing will be something that puts my faith in action, and that’s thanks to CFJ!

God’s Plan by Q

Salutations Family & Friends,

As you can tell by the title of this post this is going to be a deep one. So prepare yourself,  grab your tea, coffee, espresso (if that’s your thing)  because you’re going to be here for a while, but as always it’s going to be worth it. So in my last post, I started to share details with you about my journey applying to Graduate School at Montclair State University. Then the Holy Spirit led me on a journey to talk about my writing process, which led to a tangent about closets and ended with healing  (if you did not read it-  Go back!).  

Once I willingly started to unpack my “closet” by acknowledging that I needed to stop and heal- my mind became more clear and so did my intentions, of applying to Grad School. Through the month of January I was consistently (yet struggled) to complete my personal statement for  Public & Organizational Relations. I enlisted the help of seasoned professionals at my service site (Catholic Charities Diocese of Trenton). They eagerly listened to my rants about the necessity of connection and flow,  provided me with insight on the importance of  Leadership in an Executive position, and even edited several versions of my statement. If you’re reading this – Thank you!

 February came around and my thoughts were finally connecting. Then I received the news that a former educator of mine entered into eternal life. Stunned by his unexpected departure,  I began reflecting on our journey together, (which provided lots of laughs). When the day arrived for me to pay my respects to his family, and bid my farewells to his mortal body. I spent a portion of the morning traveling on the Riverline,  immersed in profound thoughts and memories of my education.

Here is a brief summary of my encounter…..

“I found myself surrounded by educators and former classmates, as we gathered in attendance to celebrate the life of a former educator.  I sat among them listening to the stories of his childhood, and reminiscing on profound encounters of his character. Such memories made me smile in the presence of mortality.

We collectively depicted that his devotion to the vocation of education proceeded beyond the classroom. The passion he displayed to his students was the same flame, he used to ignite the wick of knowledge, in everyone he encountered. At that very moment, I realized that I too carried that same flame. For so long, I saw my life through the perceived thoughts of others.  I viewed myself as just “the girl who lived in the projects” who carried the weight of her family on her shoulders, hoping that one day she would receive her NBA opportunity, and make it out.

However, it was through the assistance of past and present educators, that I am now able to reframe my narrative. Seeing myself as the one who redefined the odds, the one who struggled academically, and despite the presence of poverty, and mass incarceration,  persisted and became a first-generation college student and graduate. I am the one who moved on to break barriers by pursuing a year of service, not just because “I was served and wanted to serve others” as an investment, but because I want to learn how to make service my lifestyle. I am the girl who refuses to be the only one who can and will make a difference in and with my life. This is why I am interested in pursuing a Master’s degree in Educational Leadership with a concentration in Higher Education.”

Yup!  you read that right, Educational Leadership with a concentration in Higher Education. Which is now Higher Education. I know that was a  major shift, that’s exactly how I felt when I decided to follow the lead of the Holy Spirit, and “do something crazy”, by pursuing this degree.  So here I am, mid-February – mid-March, applying for two master’s programs at the same time!  Stay with me because this is where the title of my blog post is revealed.

I submitted my application for Public & Organization Relations on March 10th. I was contacted by the program coordinator on March 25th,to schedule an interview, to discuss my potential acceptance into the program. On April 2nd, the interview was conducted, and on April 4th,I found out I was accepted into the program (Wait!-Hold your applause). On Thursday, March 26th, I submitted my application for Higher Education. On Monday, March 30th,I found out I was accepted into the program! (With no interview)!!!!!. Just in case you’re wondering, Yes, I cried, Sat in awe of God’s goodness, said Thank you,  and then called my Mama!  [Mom if you’re reading this, Hey Girl!- Love You!]

If I can pause and reflect for a moment,

I can recall a moment at the beginning of my journey with CFJ.  I had just finished my summer of LeaderWorX and entered into my new role as a Fellow. Unsure of what my next would be, I operated in hope and prayed for options. Fast-forwarding to 8 months later. Now I have those options,  options that I could have never fathom for myself.  Yet – they were apart of God’s plan all along!  (But wait) He wasn’t done- After I accepted my offer into the Higher Education program, I started my search for Graduate Assistantships. That’s another great encounter- but long story short I submitted my cover letter and resume, on Saturday, April 25th, and was contacted by the program Chair for an interview the next day. On Thursday, April 30th, the interview was conducted and an offer to assume the position of a Graduate Research Assistant for Educational Leadership was extended,  (Yes, (During the interview!!!!!).

I am living proof that God is _ -whatever you need Him to be! For He will never Lead you & leave you! 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the Lord……” – Jeremiah 29:11-14

& Yes, I accepted!

When Plans Change by Q

When Plans Change!

Salutations, Family & Friends!

Remember the last time we met I told you that my abrupt leave of absence from our luxurious conversations was worth it? ….No?  It’s okay, keep reading and you will find out why!

As you may and or may not know from reading my fellowship bio. I was very adamant about pursuing my Master’s Degree in Public & Organization Relations at Montclaire State University. So adamant that I told people “IN- FAITH” that I was attending in the fall. The problem was I hadn’t even started my application yet! So……. I took a leave of absence to apply to Graduate School! 

I wish I could tell you it was EASY… but everyone around me especially those whom I enlisted for help, would tell you that it was a lie! My thought process began in November, and continued till January! Yes, I spent two months thinking about and drafting, what I would write about. Now before you start judging me, Yes! I know that many would classify that as “Procrastination”  (“the action of delaying or postponing something” ). Here’s the deal my application had no deadline. My particular program accepted applications upon rolling admissions. This means in short, I can apply whenever, as long as it is before the start of my intended enrollment period.  Now I also know your thinking, so why didn’t you just “do it” and get it out of the way! I am sorry to disappoint you, but I’m not perfect! & neither is my writing process.

As a writer, the most important step in writing anything is to tell yourself the story first. Within this process, one has to have a conversation with themself, about themself. (If that was a lot I am simply saying )“Having a talk with yourself, about yourself”.

In this process, things get messy, because you have to re-live certain moments that brought you joy and pain. I can’t help but think about a closet. Have you ever threw something in the closet as a means of “getting it out of the way”?  To make room for something else,  and or just to make the room look cleaner? …. I know you have! 

Take it in! (Go ahead- reminisce- maybe even throw a little something in the closet, if that’s your thing)…. At that moment it makes you feel good! But what happens when you’re looking for that one thing you can’t seem to find anywhere. Then the Holy Spirit reminds you, that you put it in the closet! Can’t relate? Okay, What about this one, & Raise your hand if this is you! Have you ever sent someone to get something from your room and or closet and to them it looks like a chaotic mess, but you tell them and yourself “You have a System”- No? Just me? … Okay.

The point that I am trying to make here is that writing is both messy yet beautiful.

Although we have a system, there comes a time where the closet (our minds) become so cluttered and dare say,  disoriented that we must take time to, Stop!  Pull things out, Donate, Reorganize, and Heal.  

* Stay tuned for the full update on My Journey to Grad school! * & Remember….

 Live in Your Purpose, Not in Your Pain. – Q

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